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What's your favorite CLEAN joke???
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SandChan
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Messages: 284 , Offline
4 days til Halloween
speaking of Halloween....got that from Justhank or.....not justhank

Halloween Riddles

Why don't skeletons like parties?
They have no body to dance with.
What do you get if you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter?
Pumpkin Pi.
Why did the vampire go to the orthodontist?
To improve his bite...
What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?
Frostbite...
Why did the ghost go into the bar?
For the Boos.
What kind of key does a skeleton use? and everybody say..
A skeleton key
 
SandChan
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Messages: 284 , Offline
Costume Party

A couple was invited to a masked costume Halloween Party. The wife had a headache and told her husband to go alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she persuaded him to go. So he took his costume and away he went.

One hour later the wife, after taking a couple of aspirin, decided to go to the party. In as much as her husband did not know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching him to see how he acted when she was not with him.

She joined the party and soon spotted her husband cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every nice chick he could, and copping a little feel here and a little kiss there. His wife sidled up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his partner high and dry and devoted his time to her.

She let him go as far as he wished; naturally, since he was her husband, even when he propositioned her to go to his car.(use your imagination)
Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away and went home and put the costume away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would make for his behavior.

When he came in she asked what kind of a time he had. He said, "Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you're not there."
Then she asked, "Did you dance much?"
He replied, "I didn’t danced one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Bill Brown and some other guys, so we went into the den and played poker all evening.
But I'll tell you... the guy I loaned my costume to said he sure had a real good time!"







 

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at Mon, 26 Oct 2009 21:33

SandChan
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Messages: 284 , Offline
alrighty then... (got that one from lionesss24) looks like I'm the only one here but that's okay because I'm an only child and accustomed to having fun all by myself.
It's an acquired function.

Last of the Halloween jokes.

Things Said On Halloween That Sound Dirty , But Aren't...
So...What'd you get in the sack?
Once you get under the sheet, start moaning and groaning!!!
I got the best piece from that house.  
lionesss24
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Messages: 290 , Offline
hi sandchan great jokes now yer not all alone! ; o) !  
jewelicious
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Messages: 161 , Offline
A local car company hired a new CEO to make the company more efficient. On The Ceo'sfirst day he noticed all the other factory workers were busy except for a young man leaning up against a piece of machinery. The CEO decided he was going to show off his authority and yelled at the boy and said "YOU, How much do you make per week?" The young man startled replied "Oh about $400." The Ceo reached for his wallet and pulled out $1600. Then with a smug grin on his face, he handed the young man the money and said "Here's a months wages, now get out and don't come back here again." The boy ran off. The CEO looked at another employee standing there and asked what the boy did at the factory . The man replied "Nothing, He was the Pizza delivery guy."  
SandChan
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Messages: 284 , Offline
Thanksgiving is on it's way but Grandma is not coming for dinner this year. She sent a letter telling us why.

A letter from Grandma . . . Dear family:
I have become a little older since I saw you last, and a few changes have come into my life since then. Sorry but I don't think I'll be able to make it for Thanksgiving dinner. Frankly, I have become a frivolous old gal.
I am seeing five gentlemen everyday. As soon as I wake up, Will Power comes to help me get out of bed. Then I am immediately impelled to go to see John. Then Charlie Horse comes along, and when he is here he takes a lot of my time and attention. When he leaves, Arthur Ritis shows up and stays the rest of the day. He doesn't like to stay in one place very long, so he takes me from joint to joint. After such a busy day, I'm really tired and glad to go to bed with Ben Gay. What a life.
Oh yes, I'm also flirting with Al Zymer.
Love, Grandma
P.S. Then there is this other guy who stops by time to time; he's called Father Tyme. He said at my age I should be thinking of the hereafter. I told him, "Oh I do it all the time. No matter where I am, in the parlor, upstairs, in the kitchen, or down in the basement, I ask myself, "Now, what am I here after?"
 
NeverKaren
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Messages: 3 , Offline
knock knock
who's there?
dwayne
dwayne who?
dwayne the bath tub i'm dwowning  
SandChan
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Messages: 284 , Offline
Good one NeverKaren that had to be Tweety Bird, right.  
DexGypMom
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Messages: 2665 , Offline

I think we need a SandChan weekly comedy hour. Since Sandra is so excellent at coming up with quips on the fly, I bet if we gave her a new topic every week, she'd come up with a million routines for our enjoyment. What do you say Sandy, are you up for a weekly gig with audience chosen topics? Think about it...you've got quite a fan base here.

•••MaryBeth

Volunteer Forum Moderator
 
justhank
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Messages: 188 , Offline
Mary Beth ,

great idea. If i promise to be good .......ah! never mind. i can't promis that. but still a great idea.  
lionesss24
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Messages: 290 , Offline
An inebriated man is asked to leave the bar so he decides to leave & go to another bar,walks out the front door goes around the corner & comes in the back door and says to the bartender "You work here too?"(true story)  
SandChan
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Messages: 284 , Offline
DexGypMom wrote:
I think we need a SandChan weekly comedy hour. Since Sandra is so excellent at coming up with quips on the fly, I bet if we gave her a new topic every week, she'd come up with a million routines for our enjoyment. What do you say Sandy, are you up for a weekly gig with audience chosen topics? Think about it...you've got quite a fan base here.•••MaryBeth
Volunteer Forum Moderator

Thanks Dex for that commendation.
"Sand Chan weekly comedy hour"-- sounds good. "on the fly"-- now that I don't know about. I said I think YOU can walk on water(maybe you didn't see that post) not me. Some jokes I post are mine and some I change into mine. I get them from here and there. I probably could come up with something on a specified topic by searching for it. But on thy fly, I don't think so.
Sure I'm up for a weekly gig with audience chosen topics.

So...uh... how much does this gig pay?  
SandChan
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Messages: 284 , Offline

justhank wrote:Mary Beth ,
great idea. If i promise to be good .......ah! never mind. i can't promis that. but still a great idea.

Sure you can JustHank, you can make that promise, it'll just be like the old man who thought Jesus was his son. (remember that post?)
Hey... wait a minute. You are not JustHank because JustHank always ends his post with ".......notJustHank". And the post about the old man who thought Jesus was his son was not JustHank either.  
SandChan
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Messages: 284 , Offline
DexGypMom wrote:
What do you say Sandy, are you up for a weekly gig with audience chosen topics? Think about it...you've got quite a fan base here....MaryBeth

Volunteer Forum Moderator

Ok I thought about it.
How about everyone post on a specific topic.
That would be fun;
and I was thinking maybe we should ask emcall.
She did start this thread after all.
Oh-oh hold it, the girl's a poet and didn't even know it. Look I did it again. I'll have to stop this, man.  

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at Tue, 10 Nov 2009 00:50

SandChan
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Messages: 284 , Offline
Well then moving right along
Before I married I dated this guy who was very handsome and really fine. I didn't know how dumb he was until one day we were at the drive thru of a fast food place. He was in a hurry. I pulled up to the window and said "Give me a burger..."and he broke in saying "Sand" and I said, "hold on I'm not done" then I continued my order with "no onions and hold the.. " and he interrupted again with "Sand" After the third time I yelled, "WHAT!" He said, "Tell them it's to go."  
ShayeraHol
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Messages: 343 , Offline
Here's one for Thanksgiving:

Q: What did the stressed mama turkey say
to her naughty chicks?

A: "If your father could only see you now,
he'd turn over in his gravy!"  
lionesss24
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Messages: 290 , Offline
Good? thing you didn't 'marry' that 1 Sandra! If he only knew that it was really him 'to go' LMBO!


....And now for a little Rodney Dangerfield!

RECIPE FOR THE PERFECT MARRIAGE

1. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship. She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays.

2. We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas.

3. I take my wife everywhere..... but she keeps finding her way back.

4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our

anniversary. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said. So I suggested the kitchen.

5. We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.

6. She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric bread maker. She said "There are too many gadgets and no place to sit down!" .. So I bought her an electric chair.

7. My wife told me the car wasn't running well because there was water in the carburetor. I asked where the car was; she told me "In the lake."

8. She got a mud pack and looked great for two days.

Then the mud fell off.

9. She ran after the garbage truck, yelling "Am I too late for the garbage?" .... The driver said "No, jump in!"

10. Remember: Marriage is the number one cause of divorce.

11. I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.

12. I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months. I don't like to interrupt her.

13. The last fight was my fault though! My wife asked "What's on the TV?" I said "Dust!"  

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at Thu, 12 Nov 2009 10:16

jewelicious
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Messages: 161 , Offline
...To carry on the Rodney Dangerfield theme...

"I get no respect...I called Suicide Prevention last week and they put me on HOLD."
Badumbum  
lionesss24
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Messages: 290 , Offline
poor Rodney!! LMBO!  
SandChan
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Messages: 284 , Offline
lionesss24 wrote: Good? thing you didn't 'marry' that 1 Sandra! If he only knew that it was really him 'to go' LMBO!

I wish I would have thought of that. It would have been a perfect ending.

and to carry on the Rodney Dangerfield theme...
One of his one liners---"I know I'm ugly every time my mother wants the first place in line she just pulls out my picture." Bada bing, bada boom!

Rodney Dangerfield I tell ya, he don't get no respect at all, even when he arrived at the Pearly Gates St. Peter said to him,
"Tell me what you did in life that makes you worthy of coming in."
Rodney said, "That's easy. I made people laugh.
St. Peter responded, "God gave you your looks, I want to know what YOU did."  
lionesss24
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Messages: 290 , Offline

poor poor Rodney!


HEY I like the LMBO picture! ahhhh  
ShayeraHol
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Messages: 343 , Offline
Great graphic, SandChan! I'm LMBO right now!  
justhank
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Messages: 188 , Offline
SandChan wrote:
justhank wrote:Mary Beth ,
great idea. If i promise to be good .......ah! never mind. i can't promis that. but still a great idea.

Sure you can JustHank, you can make that promise, it'll just be like the old man who thought Jesus was his son. (remember that post?)
Hey... wait a minute. You are not JustHank because JustHank always ends his post with ".......notJustHank". And the post about the old man who thought Jesus was his son was not JustHank either.



ok,.... sandchan, you almost got me confused. so let me clarify things.
i AM not justhank, i am NOT justhank. you see the difference? let me say it like this, justhank IS not justhank.
I met the most wonderful woman and now i an NOT justhank any more i AM not justhank. what is so hard to understand?


so that was my joke. but i got another one. and since you brought the subject up, or should i say........

speaking of jesus, he was walking around in heaven and saw mother teresa looking upset.
"mother teresa, why so upset? your in heaven ! for christ sakes", he says.
"all my life i sacrificed, worked for the poor", she tells him.
"yeah, yeah, i know ....you made it! your in heaven!", he says as he spreads his arms out .
"well, i just saw princess di, why does she get a halo?", she asks.
jesus shakes his head and says, "that's not a halo, it's a steering wheel !"


.................. not justhank  
SandChan
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Messages: 284 , Offline
justhank wrote:
ok,.... sandchan, you almost got me confused. so let me clarify things.
i AM not justhank, i am NOT justhank. you see the difference? let me say it like this, justhank IS not justhank.
I met the most wonderful woman and now i an NOT justhank any more i AM not justhank. what is so hard to understand?......... not justhank



Well I was clear about notjusthank being justhank and justhank not being justhank.
But now I'm just not sure about justhank.

uh...you wana run that by me one more time.
 
SandChan
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Messages: 284 , Offline
BREAKING NEWS
                      
                       Update
SandChan has a serious side!

The previous announcement has died because emcall is a friend and I wouldn't want a joke to cause any serious intervention by the moderators to this great enjoyable thread that she created.
Life does not cease to be funny when one joke dies any more than it ceases to be serious when one is brought to life.
speaking of dying...........
Me and two of my friends went to a funeral together. Afterwards we went to eat and were talking about what nice things people had to said about the deceased. I said, "Have you ever heard anyone say something bad about a person at a funeral?" Then we began discussing what we would like to hear when we would be in our casket.
One friend said, "I would like to hear people say that I was a great mother and a great wife."
The second friend said, "I would like to hear that I was a good Samaritan and that I made a difference in someone's life."
I said, "I would like to hear them say.......LOOK, SHE'S MOVING!!!!!!!!!
 

This message was edited 3 times. Last update was at Thu, 19 Nov 2009 23:57

scotkitty
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Messages: 189 , Offline
Ok, I'll try this. **I had to change some of the words in my joke to make it "clean".

SAYING GOODBYE TO MOTHER......

You Don't Have To Own A Cat To Appreciate This One! You don't even have to like 'em!

We were dressed and ready to go out for the New Years Eve Party. We turned on a night light, turned the answering machine on, covered our pet parakeet and put the cat in the backyard.

We phoned the local cab company and requested a taxi. The taxi arrived and we opened the front door to leave the house.

The cat we put out in the yard, scoots back into the house. We didn't want the cat shut in the house because she always tries to eat the bird.

My wife goes out to the taxi, while I went inside to get the cat. The cat runs upstairs, with me in hot pursuit. Waiting in the cab, my wife doesn't want the driver to know that the house will be empty for the night. So, she explains to the taxi driver that I will be out soon, "He's just going upstairs to say Goodbye to my mother."

A few minutes later, I get into the cab. "Sorry I took so long," I said, as we drove away. "That stupid witch was hiding under the bed. I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! She tried to take off, so I grabbed her by the neck. Then, I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching me. But it worked! I hauled her fat behind downstairs and threw her out into the back yard!"

The cab driver hit a parked car .
 
momaie
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Messages: 2451 , Offline
thanks scotkitty! This was a great Monday morning laugh; I have 2 cats and sometimes when I'm talking about them, people get a very strange look in their eyes....I'll have to rethink what I say! still chuckling...thanks for a laugh on a gloomy Monday!  
SandChan
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Messages: 284 , Offline
Got Your Turkey Yet...
When I was young my dad told me of the tradition of shooting your own turkey for Thanksgiving.
He told me about using very soft "clucks" and "purrs" to entice the gobbler to come closer and how long he would sit still and wait for it to come out and sometimes it would attack him.. So when I had my chance to do the traditional thing of shooting my own turkey for Thanksgiving. I thought all that stuff
was to much and it was time for a change. . . . you should have seen the people scatter in the meat department. maybe you have to think about it a little  
SandChan
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Messages: 284 , Offline
My Hotel iWin Sisters

I have a funny video of me and my 3 sisters at Hotel iWin. Mom had quadruplets. We look alike with slight differences in our jaw bones. cluvk and legacy48 are at the top they are identical.
Me and mombrooks are at the bottom we are identical, our jaw bones are a little wider than the other two. I twied and twied to put the video up but no matter how hard I twied I couldn't dwo wit. So here is the link.http://lps.myfacelol.com/v101/default.aspx?m=movies/holiday/Santa.swf&b=http://www.myfacelol.com/assets/&df1=userimg/36/597bc69d-4112-47cf-aeb9-c4576993c547-1680641.png&df2=userimg/36/597bc69d-4112-47cf-aeb9-c4576993c547-1680718.png&df3=userimg/36/597bc69d-4112-47cf-aeb9-c4576993c547-1680718.png&df4=userimg/36/597bc69d-4112-47cf-aeb9-c4576993c547-1680641.pngIt's called DancN Santas.  

This message was edited 3 times. Last update was at Sun, 6 Dec 2009 04:06

SandChan
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Messages: 284 , Offline

A man was telling his neighbor, "I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it's state of the art."
"Really," answered the neighbor, "What kind is it?"
The man said, "Twelve thirty."  

This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at Sun, 6 Dec 2009 03:17

123wendy1
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Messages: 1 , Offline
when this lady got home there was a wolf the wolf said its passed my
lunch time then the lady said arent u soppose to come at twilight then the wolf said not accoring to my schule  

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at Sun, 13 Dec 2009 16:31

peacefansinger001
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Messages: 22 , Offline
A man walks into a doctor's office. THe doctor comesin. He say, "What seems to be the problem. The man storms out. The doctor asks, " what's wrong. He goes,"After all those years of medical school you want me to make the diagnosis.  
SandChan
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Messages: 284 , Offline
Good one peacefansinger001
When they ask me that I ask, "Am I gonna get put on the payroll?"
Speaking of doctors.........
Jim and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Edna promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim out.

When the doctor became aware of Edna's heroic act, he immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital as he now considered her to be mentally stable.
When he went to tell Edna the news he said, "Edna, I have good news and bad news.

The good news is you're being discharged, since you were able to rationally respond to a crisis by jumping in and saving the life of another patient.
I have concluded that your act displays sound mind-ness.

The bad news is, Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself with his bathrobe belt in the bathroom. I am so sorry, but he's dead."
Edna replied "He didn't hang himself, I put him there to dry."  

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at Wed, 16 Dec 2009 23:21

DexGypMom
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Messages: 2665 , Offline

Sandra --

When you say, "I got a million of 'em", you truly do. I liked the one about the funeral and I'm definitely telling my mom the hearing aid joke. She, too, bought a couple of those state of the art, $4K hearing aids and she still can't hear. We do make fun of her sometimes. One day the batteries went dead in her hearing aids and she forgot to pick up some replacements. So my sister and I began a conversation in front of her. We were moving our lips and gesturing but we made no sound. She didn't think that was funny but we did. She slapped us both--we were in our late 40's.

I see no one liked the give-Sandra-a-funny-subject and let you run with it. Remember the show, "Kids Say the Darndest Things"? Art Linkletter hosted the first series and Bill Cosby resurrected it in the 80's. Do have any humorous thoughts along those lines? Can't wait to read your creations.

•••MaryBeth

Volunteer Forum Moderator
 
joanietreb
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Messages: 538 , Offline
Maybe Sand could start a new thread like *Improv theater* where several folks throw out suggestions and the story evolves on its own?  
goofyduck1
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Messages: 1391 , Offline
Oh, my gosh - Kids Say the Darndest Things - my grandmother and I used to watch that show when I was a kid all the time. I loved it. And the Bill Cosby one, too. I wish I could think of a few things from those shows. They were hysterical.  
ponycarmom
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Messages: 635 , Offline
that was a good show, both bill cosby and art linkletter, but so was candid camera, and america's funniest home video's!  

This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at Sun, 15 Aug 2010 17:30

harmony
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Messages: 41 , Offline
Every year this couple went to the state fair..The husband would beg every year..*please lets go on the helicopter ride! and the wife would say NO..its 50$!! 50 dollars is 50 dollars!! finally theyre in their 70's and husband says I want to go on helicopter ride! i might be dead next year this may be my last chance!..wife says NO..50 dollars is 50 dollars!! husband says well can we at least go over there so i can look* at the helicopters..they're by helicopters and pilot hears them arguing and says Look ill take u both up for free as long as there is no screaming ..no arguing..no fighting..nothing..u make no noise ill charge u nothing..they agree! Pilot figures he can get them to scream by doing some tricks so he zooms up..zooms and dips left..dips right..dips left.. does some loop~de ~loop stuff and nothing!! not a sound from the back ? ..hes amazed..he lands the helicopter and says to the man ..Im impressed... I didnt hear a peep from the back, how did u do that ? the man says .......... well i almost said something when Helen fell out on that left turn..but.. 50 dollars is 50 dollars !  
SandChan
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Messages: 284 , Offline
Wow! we got a full house tonight. I don't know how to act. I'm used of being here alone cracking myself up, gluing me back together and starting over again. "Right On!" to your mom Dex. You 40-ish yr old ladies had it coming, but picturing that, it is so-o-o funny. I bugged my mom all the time but I had an excuse, I'm an only child. I would pull jokes on her just to hear her say, "Sandra why are you aggravating and agitating me?"
I thought that was funny. She didn't--- but I moved faster than she did.

Alrighty then...
Teacher: Tonight is open house.
Lil Johnny: I ain't goin'.
Teacher: Now, you must not say, " ain't goin'."
You should say, "I am not going, he is not going; we are not going; they are not going."
Lil Johnny: Geez! Ain't nobody goin' then?  
DexGypMom
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Messages: 2665 , Offline

Hi Sandra --

Very cute for a warmer-upper. Can we expect more on the topic or should I throw out another one? Hmmm....Men having to shop for female only products for their significant others. I think quite a few charming ditties including anecdotal material will come from this topic.

•••MaryBeth
 
ponycarmom
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Messages: 635 , Offline
this ought to be interesting, i'll have to keep my eye on this one! lol!  

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at Mon, 30 Aug 2010 16:07

SandChan
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Messages: 284 , Offline
Whoa Dex, that's some topic. I can't come up with a thing. How about you? You must have something in mind. How about you do one on that topic and I see what I can do.
until then............
An elementary class was on a field trip to the F.B.I. Headquarters where they saw pictures, tacked to a bulletin board, of the 10 most wanted men. One of the youngsters pointed to the picture on top and asked if it really was the picture of Osama Bin Laden.
Yes," said the agent. "The bureau wants him very badly." One little girl whispered to the teacher, "Does F.B.I mean For Being Ignorant?" The teacher says, "No, it means Federal Bureau of Investigation. " The little girl says well why
didn't they keep him when they took his picture?"
 
Brit8222
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Messages: 16 , Offline
There were 3 girls, blonde girl, brunette girl, and redhead girl
They went walking on a bridge one day, and A fairy came along and told the girls, "If you say something that you want to be and jump off the bridge you will turn into it."
The Brunette said "Swan" She jumped off became a beautiful swan
The Redhead said, "Eagle" She jumped off, beccame a beautiful Eagle.
The Blonde jumped off the bridge without thinking and said, "Oh, poo!" And she turned into..........................................  

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at Sat, 19 Dec 2009 23:15

lionesss24
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Messages: 290 , Offline
good 1 Sand ! bada bing !  

This message was edited 1 time. Last update was at Sun, 20 Dec 2009 00:00

DexGypMom
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Messages: 2665 , Offline

Oh Sandra -- Send that one to the FBI in a Christmas Card; they're gonna love it. he-he

BTW - I am working on perfecting one for my suggestion; so far it's a yawner.

•••MaryBeth
 
l4dyh4wk2
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Messages: 407 , Offline
I agree Sand that was a good one... are you familiar with the saying "out of the mouth of babes" ? The see things in such a simple uncomplicated light. We could learn a thing or two.

As far as my joke I'm going to try to tackle Dex's challenge topic. I'll make it as discrete as I can... if it offends anyone (I apologize)_please feel free to remove it.

During the current economic problems there is a couple that are trying to save money whereever possible. The are clipping coupons & shopping the sales. They decided that if they couldn't pay cash for something they wouldn't buy it. One day the wife got a call from her husband asking that she pick up cigarettes on her way home from work so he wouldn't have to drive out to get them. She said ok. When she got to the smoke shop she found she didn't have enough cash to purchase his preferred brand. The man behind the counter understanding her predicament suggested she buy tobacco & papers, which would be less money. Knowing how irritable he could get when he didn't smoke she thought it was a good idea. When her husband asked why she explained that that was all she could afford without using the credit card. About a week later the wife called the husband with a small list of things to pick up from the store. He wrote everything down & told her he would see her at home. At the store he carefully compared prices when selecting the items she requested working his way down the list. When he came to feminine supplies he went to the appropriate isle and was shocked to see how expensive everything was but knowing that it was not something that she could do without he did the best he could. When the wife was unpacking the bags she found a box of first aid cotton and a ball of cotton twine. Turning to her husband she said, "why did you get this? It wasn't on my list."
He said, "yes it was... If I can roll my own so can you"
 
lionesss24
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Messages: 290 , Offline
LOL what's good for the goose is good for the gander ay? LOL !  
SandChan
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Messages: 284 , Offline
l4dyh4wk2 that was great!
 

This message was edited 2 times. Last update was at Mon, 21 Dec 2009 23:11

SandChan
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Messages: 284 , Offline
and Dex I'll be looking for yours.  
DexGypMom
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Well Ali....That was fabulous!! I cannot top it by a long shot, so here's my yawner so everyone can appreciate your and Sandra's supreme yuck it up skills.

A young newlywed husband entered the neighborhood pharmacy rather sheepishly. He attempted to stroll down the aisles looking nonchalant but caught the eye of the check out clerk. Thinking he may be a shoplifter the clerk kept his eye on him as he seemed to be sneaking around the store. Looking up at aisle signs, the newlywed found the dreaded ladies only shelves but noticed two shoppers still choosing items so he circled back to the magazine rack waiting until they left. The clerk now totally suspicious was just about to leave the counter to confront him when the two shoppers came to check out. While checking out the customers, he noticed packages flying up into the air from the ladies only aisle. As soon as the last customer was checked out, he quickly ran to the aisle to confront this strange fellow in the store. "Sir, what on earth are doing?", he shouted at the newlywed. Startled and embarrassed he said to clerk, "She told me to get the ones with wings."

•••MaryBeth
 
 
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